Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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