She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
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