Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize