i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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