and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
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