haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
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and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
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Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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