don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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