i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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