Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize