Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize