i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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