Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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