If you die in college, do you die in real life?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Everclear isn't food dammit
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize