idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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