Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize