I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize