Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
im calling her cock vulture from now on
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize