I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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