I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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