Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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