I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
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