Whod you bang
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize