apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
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