Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
i just wanna soil my oats bro
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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