i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize