I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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