We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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