Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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