Will you blow on my dice?
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize