So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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