is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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