I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize