I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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