I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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