I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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