What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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