i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
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and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
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Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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