no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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