I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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