i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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