It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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