He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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