On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
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of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
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it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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