Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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