I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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