k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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