it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize