Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
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