dude i'm inner monologue high
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
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