you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
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